This is the story of a woman who has never learned to give up. She exchanged her cosy home and beautiful garden in Vinnytsia for the uncertainty of exile in order to save her child from war.
Today, she delights lovers of Bavarian cuisine in a local restaurant, discovers Germany, creates bead-embroidered artworks, and dreams of owning a house at the foot of the mountains.
This is a conversation about starting life over at the age of fifty, about why true craftsmanship needs no translation, and why it is so important to remain the heart and guardian of your family, even when your whole world has been turned upside down.
Meet Inna from Vinnytsia.
— What is your mood usually like in the morning? You seem to be a very positive person.
— I enjoy sleeping in, but I always wake up full of energy and with a smile on my face. If I've woken up, then life goes on. Every new day brings new beginnings and new opportunities.
I never wake up in a bad mood. Even when I don't feel well physically, I "put on" a smile and greet the people around me with warmth and optimism.
— Who or what can ruin your mood?
— I'm probably like a matchstick. I catch fire very quickly, but I also calm down just as fast.
I never carry negative feelings inside me for long. I try to keep sadness at a distance because if I am happy, I can also bring happiness to the people around me.
The only things that can truly upset me are the illness or the loss of someone I love. Everything else can be solved.
— When did you come to Germany? Do you remember your thoughts and feelings when you decided to leave Ukraine?
— On March 20, 2022.
We are from Vinnytsia, and we had a wonderful life there. My husband and I built a beautiful large house with a spacious garden. Shortly before the war, we bought an apartment for our daughter. She and her family had moved in only a few days before New Year's Eve and had lived there for just two months.
I remember saying to my husband:
"My God, how good our life is."
My husband had already retired and started his own metal construction business. It was very successful. His company exported metal structures to Montenegro, Dubai, and Slovenia. We truly had a very good life.
Then the war began.
Our daughter experienced severe emotional stress. Our grandson was only one year old. Because of everything that was happening, she left for Poland to stay with a friend.
I still remember the moment when my son-in-law and I said goodbye to them. I will never forget the expression in his eyes. You could see how painful it was for him to let them go.
Our city has two airports—one civilian and one military—as well as a military base. Vinnytsia was heavily bombed. The explosions shook the entire city.
One night my son, who was ten years old at the time, stood by the window, looked outside and said:
"Mom, I'm so afraid of dying from a bomb when I'm only ten years old."
That was the moment I turned to my husband and said:
"Our son and I are leaving. I don't want my child to grow up in fear."
— How did you settle into your new life?
— We first went to Poland, and later one of my daughter's friends invited us to Germany. She also found a family who welcomed us into their home.
My daughter spoke both German and English, which made things much easier. But at that time, we truly believed we would only stay for a month or two.
We were incredibly lucky to meet a wonderful family with whom we are still in close contact today. They helped us with absolutely everything.
My daughter was immediately offered a job working with Ukrainian children at a school. Later she went on maternity leave, her husband found work, and they moved to Munich.
The family we lived with owns eighteen hectares of land. They are incredibly hardworking people. After work, the husband would come home, get on his tractor, and head straight out to the fields.
I cooked for the family, and they fell in love with Ukrainian cuisine.
They also have three horses.
Horses have always been my great love.
I walked with them, looked after them, and enjoyed spending time with them.
The family also owns a part of the forest. I would often go there to pick blueberries and mushrooms.
Those six months we spent with them were, honestly, a kind of therapy for me.
— Why didn't your husband leave Ukraine with you immediately?
— Although he was already retired and could have left the country, he joined us only a year and a half later.
We had cats and dogs, and leaving everything behind wasn't easy.
He also had his business and the people who worked for him.
During the first months of the war, his company produced wood-burning stoves for soldiers at the front so they could keep warm.
Later, when constant power outages began and electricity was available for only a couple of hours a day, work became almost impossible.
Even then, he still had to pay his employees. Many of them were drafted into the army, and eventually there was no work left at all.
— Today you work as a chef in a Bavarian restaurant. How did you adapt to working in a professional kitchen?
— At first, I completed an internship. I worked for two months without pay to gain experience.
I am still very grateful that I was given that opportunity.
When the internship ended, the owner of the restaurant hired me without even asking whether I wanted to stay.
That touched me deeply.
They are genuinely wonderful people.
The Bavarian dialect was difficult for me at first. I wrote everything down, asked questions over and over again, and everyone was happy to help.
We have a board in the restaurant where orders are written down. My colleagues even wrote Bavarian words for me together with their standard German equivalents.
That support meant a great deal to me.
The restaurant is quite large and currently employs twenty-nine people.
This May, it will be two years since I started working there.
— Have you learned to prepare Bavarian dishes? Do you also bring your own ideas to the menu?
— Yes. It is a traditional Bavarian restaurant, and we welcome many tourists.
It always makes me happy when guests come into the kitchen after their meal to thank us and tell us how much they enjoyed the food.
I have learned to cook many Bavarian dishes.
And one day I made a huge pot of Ukrainian borscht for my colleagues. They loved it and even came back for second helpings.
— Was this your first experience working in a restaurant kitchen, or had you already worked in this field in Ukraine?
— I had also worked in a restaurant in Ukraine for two years.
By education, I am actually an engineer. That was my mother's dream for me, and I fulfilled it for her, although I never worked in that profession.
Some friends of ours opened a restaurant. They knew how much I loved cooking and how well I cooked, so they invited me to join their team.
In our family, everyone was a good cook. My mother cooked wonderfully, and so did my grandmother.
She came from a wealthy family. My grandfather owned large estates and employed many people, while my grandmother cooked for three villages.
My daughter is an excellent cook as well, and so is my mother-in-law.
In our family, cooking and sharing a meal is a ritual. Just as the Japanese have their tea ceremony, we have our own culture of food.
I cannot simply sit down and eat by myself.
I cook for someone or together with someone else. I enjoy presenting the food beautifully and seeing people truly enjoy what they are eating.
— Don't you get tired of cooking all day at work and then cooking again for your family at home?
— Not at all.
I truly love cooking—both at work and at home.
The two men in my family, my husband and my son, also enjoy cooking.
At the moment, my son does a lot of the cooking at home because he genuinely likes it.
Still, I always tell him:
"The most important thing is that cooking doesn't become your profession."
Because it is hard work, even though I love every part of it.
— What is your favourite family dish?
— Probably Ukrainian nalysnyky—thin pancakes with different fillings.
Nothing makes me happier than seeing people enjoy my food and leave the table satisfied.
— You had a large garden in Ukraine. Where does your love of gardening come from?
— Our garden stands on the land that belonged to my grandmother.
She loved gardening.
The trees were already old and very large. When we built our house, we gradually removed the old ones and planted new ones. I always dreamed that one day my children and grandchildren would come to visit and that I could treat them to fruit and vegetables from our own garden. We have around sixty different varieties of apple trees—small trees, but incredibly productive, with summer, autumn, and winter varieties. We also grow pears, more than ten varieties of grapes, and countless sweet cherry trees. Our home is beautiful. We poured our whole lives into creating it.
My husband even taught himself how to graft fruit trees. We have one pear tree that produces eight different varieties of pears. He has a special gift. Everything he plants flourishes. That is where our love of nature comes from.
Nature gives you an incredible amount of energy. You may become physically tired, but at the same time you feel renewed and full of joy. I also had a very large flower garden. Every morning I would walk outside with a cup of coffee, sit among the flowers, and simply admire the beauty around me.
I still dream about those mornings.
— What has happened to your house and your garden now?
— Our neighbour looks after the garden and regularly sends me photographs.
At the moment, a family from Mariupol is living in our house and taking care of it as well.
I told my neighbour:
"Please find a family who needs a place to live. Let them stay there and simply pay the utility bills. I don't need anything else. I just want the house to be lived in."
Since the war began, I have completely rethought many things in my life. All the material things we spent a lifetime building suddenly lost their true value. The only thing you can really take with you wherever you go is what you carry in your mind and in your heart. I dream of renting a house here one day—or perhaps even buying one. Somewhere at the foot of the mountains, close to a lake. And definitely in Bavaria.
I fell in love with this region from the very first day I arrived.
— What do you enjoy doing in your free time?
— I create bead embroidery.
It all began with the embroidered wedding towels I made for my daughter's wedding. Embroidery calms me and gives me peace. Years ago, I also completed courses in knitting, pattern making, and sewing, but embroidery has always been closest to my heart.
In Ukraine, I embroidered a great deal—both as gifts and for sale. I created large religious icons and decorative pictures.
One of my biggest works was a picture called "Red Poppies." Poppies are my favourite flowers. I gave this piece to the German family who welcomed us into their home after we arrived.
Today I embroider less often. Instead, I read books in German to keep improving my language skills. I no longer attend language courses, so I have to practise on my own.
— Where do you find your strength and inspiration?
— Probably in my family.
I want them to be happy. If I were constantly sad, everyone around me would be sad as well.
A woman is the guardian of her family. She sets the atmosphere in the home, creates harmony, and encourages those around her. I believe there is no other way. If a woman falls into despair, the whole family suffers with her.
Making other people happy gives me great joy. I have never been someone who enjoys doing nothing.
— What does your ideal day off look like today?
— Here in Germany, I love going for walks.
We hike in the mountains, visit lakes, and travel all over Germany.
We have two hiking backpacks, and no matter how tired I am after work, we pack them at the weekend, get on a train, and set off on another adventure.
— How has the war changed you?
— I think it has changed every one of us. It was a turning point in our lives. It made me stronger. For a long time, I mourned the life I had lost. Today I understand that my old life will never come back. Sometimes that realization is still very painful.
But then I remind myself that the past cannot be changed. Life has to go on. We have to keep moving forward.
I want to help my son receive a good education so that he can build a future here.
I also want to help my daughter raise her little children. Interestingly, since moving to Germany, my daughter has embraced Ukrainian traditions even more strongly than before. At Easter, we always bake paska. At Christmas, we prepare the traditional twelve dishes. And every member of our family owns a vyshyvanka.
— Do you still have relatives in Ukraine?
— Of my closest relatives, only my aunt is still there.
I support her as much as I can because I know how difficult it is to live on a pension today.
I was only twelve years old when my parents died. My grandmother raised me. She always told me:
"Whatever you do, do it with all your heart, and let it bring you joy."
My aunt supported me throughout my life. I will never forget her kindness.
— Are you satisfied with yourself today? And what would you say to women who are still unsure whether they should leave their homeland?
— Yes, I am. There was a time when I believed learning a foreign language would be impossible for me.
Today, I am actually proud of myself for everything I have managed to accomplish.
And to other women I would say this: For the sake of her child, a mother should be willing to do everything she can.
We must protect our children and give them the opportunity to live, to learn, and to receive a good education, so that one day they can return home and help rebuild our country. Ukrainians are a beautiful, wise, and talented nation.
Today, the whole world can see that. Wherever life takes us, we will find our way. Today, we contribute to Germany.
Tomorrow, we will help rebuild Ukraine.
Interview and editorial editing:
Slava Onufryk, Ukrainian journalist and volunteer
