What was your life like before the war?
Before the war, I had already been an entrepreneur for 17 years. My life was very active and full of work and personal development. I built my business, created and led teams, studied, travelled, and had a clear sense of where I was going.
What did you love most about yourself and your former life in Ukraine?
I loved my strength, my independence, and being responsible for my own life. In Ukraine, I felt confident, fulfilled, and needed. Everything I had was created with my own hands.
Tell us a little about your profession and your work in Ukraine.
In Ukraine, I owned three pole dance studios. In addition, I had a business producing and selling clothing and accessories for pole dance. I was also studying psychology and was a member of a prestigious Ukrainian business club. For me, it was my life's work – a combination of the body, psychology, business, and feminine strength.
What do you miss most from your life before the war?
More than anything, I miss the feeling of home, stability, and security. I miss having the people close to me and the confidence of knowing what tomorrow will bring.
When did you realise that you had to leave the country? Had you ever wanted to live in Europe?
I realised on the very first day of the war that I had to leave. My son and I left Ukraine together immediately, and I have not been home even once since then. Before the war, I had already been planning a trip to Europe. I wanted to live here for one to three months to gain experience and broaden my horizons. I never imagined that it would become forced emigration.
What did you take with you when you left home – an object, a memory, a photograph, a smell?
I took only a few belongings and my son's favourite toy. I was convinced that we would return home after three or four days. But as we were leaving Kharkiv, I saw an explosion behind our car. At that moment, I realised that we would not be returning as quickly as I had imagined.
What helped you not to break down?
My son. I am alone with my son – and that means I have no right to break down. It is simply impossible.
Describe your day today.
My day today consists of work, taking care of my child, constant planning, and rebuilding my life from scratch. It means a lot of responsibility and exhaustion, but also small victories that give me the strength to keep moving forward.
How do you fulfil yourself here?
Here, I continue to fulfil myself through my profession. I am building a business again, opening a pole dance studio, working with people, and creating a space of support and strength for women in another country.
Have you changed? And if so, how?
Yes, very much. I have become stronger and more patient, but at the same time more vulnerable. I have learned to appreciate simple things and not to put life off until later. I trust myself more.
I used to always manage everything on my own, but now I have learned to accept help with gratitude. I have realised that needing support is not a weakness, but part of being human and mature.
What do you dream about today?
I dream of peace. Of safety and stability for my son. Of developing my business. And of one day feeling at home again – regardless of the country.
Question preparation:
Slava Onufryk, Ukrainian journalist and volunteer
Personal text by Lilia Hapich
